Monday Confession

I had such a great time, having fun with 30 slots being booked from my Book Binding Workshop at Fabric Fanatics. Being blessed always, with the continuos support from repeat and new students from many background, that came all the way from Singapore, Johor Bahru, Terengganu & KL. Alhamdulillah….

DAY 1: Slot 1: Kettle Stitch
Ms Goh, Jenny, Husna, Yogee & Liyana

DAY 1: Slot 2: Coptic Stitch
Lee Lin. Hooi Luen, Yogee,  Jenny, Linda, & Michelle
(Emily, Amy, Pei Chuan & Ms Goh is not in the picture)

DAY 2: Slot 3: French Stitch
Amy, Husna, Nana, Chi Ven, Michelle, Jogee & Ms Goh

DAY 2: Slot4: Long Stitch
Samantha, Ms Goh, Liyana, Nana, Michelle, Yogee, Linda & Honey.
Amy was not in picture.

Liyana & Family came all the way from Terengganu.

French Stitch

Long Stitch 

Ms Goh & Michelle, work in progress

With Ms Goh, my student number 700

Lee Lin & Hooi Luen

Husna from Singapore, Chin Ven & Amy

All of them are so passionate wanted to learn book binding skill. My student reached 700 yesterday. It was amazing that I never get tired doing this… Book binding is in my blood, and having this workshop perhaps is the way I am sharing the skill with others.

All of them have thousand reason why they came to learn, to kill their time, to learn new skill, looking at it as a business opportunity… thousand reason and only God knows why. My duty is to share as much as I can… My student number 1 may not learn or get much tips as much as my students number 700, because through out my teaching journey I had picked up new techniques, deal with different material, and I consider myself very generous sharing it all.

Some may say I am too nice, I should keep some knowledge or hide a bit of secret to myself. My answer is I do not know how not to be nice. This is just how I behave. I always treat my student equally.. I build up so much friendship and love and may be a little enemy. I had learnt from them too. I do not only learn and enhance my teaching skill but I learn about 1001 human characters. Do I call it obstacle, NOPE it make me to strive even  harder. I kind of accept that this is part of parcel.

This post may sounded so intense; I rarely share what I felt.. about students that never admit they used to learn from me, student that came all the way just to get my supplier list so that they can make money out of it, student that open up a workshop I week after they learn from me and charge much higher and many more motives. It hurt me a lot at the beginning…God knows, how I feel so down and everything seems so unfair…but I am becoming like a steel and feeling numb nowadays. I only can teach them book binding but to teach them about being ethical, is not my job. Yes I do tell them a bit of my journey and stories, but if they still do not get it then I will let it be because I don't want all this to kill my passion or feel demotivated. I refuse to behave and be at the same level as them. I rather to focus on my priority.

So I decided I only going to focus on teaching, I will teach as long as I can, and I am more than happy if ever I am no longer around, some one can still continue my legacy hopefully with same fire, spirit and passion.

I have an obligation here. I can't even make my good friend to understand my situation neither the people that I only met for the first time. They do not understand my hardship, what they get is all the summarise of my 20 years experience and I do not expect them to understand because the basic rule is all about RESPECT. If they do not have that value, then it's too bad because how hard you try to explain, they are not going through what I had been through. Perhaps one day when they felt what I feel, only then I may gain some respect but even that I do not expect any respect either.

I absolutely understand when other craft teacher facing the same problem and convey their frustration and ask me why am I being too nice. I open up my heart only to look at honesty, happy to assist them as being hunger to learn something new….and they are my anak-anak. As a mom I must accept that no matter how they behave.. they will remain as my anak-anak, always and forever.